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Main Memorial

Tank

2014-04-202025-11-29
Porch security, cracker division

Tank was an Embden goose who guarded the Bell family's porch in rural Pennsylvania for eleven years with unreasonable confidence. He tolerated visitors, negotiated with children, and accepted crackers only from the mail carrier. Everyone else was subject to review. At Christmas the family hung a wreath at goose height because Tank considered the lower railing his jurisdiction. He stood beside it like a tiny white customs officer, suspicious of every parcel and personally offended by decorative bows. Tank's absence made the porch too quiet. The mail carrier still pauses at the steps, out of habit, with one cracker in his pocket.

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